Wednesday, October 29, 2014

I think middle school/puberty/7th grade homework is going to kill me.

Field with mother and young rhino - - 1007185Ever wonder how you made it out of middle school alive? My 7th grade days were not pretty, not with the cussing, bad hair phase, and determination to dismiss any and all authority. I had two best friends. One had fresh ketchup stains on her uniform shirt by the morning bell every day. The other was a living angel. Seriously a beautiful person. I had a certain rapport with the teachers. They didn't like me and I didn't like them. They actually got together and agreed to fail me if I ever turned in another paper written in cursive. Well, fine, my print was pretty terrible too. And I had an arch nemesis. She insulted me every day and I flipped her off (in my head). But I made it. Now that I'm a mom, I wonder how my mother survived my middle school years.

See where this is going? My oldest is in 7th grade. He is no longer the smiley sweet little guy who gave me pats on the back. Now he tells me, "Fine, I'll follow your lame-o rules!" He's actually very unpleasant, swears like a sailor, and can't stand anyone telling him what to do! What is that about? And school? Forget about cooperation to get him through that particular chore. Let's take his science class. 
"Will, do you have science H/W for tomorrow?" 
"Check." He checks after telling me he's tired of people bossing him around. 
"Yep." Since he doesn't have a textbook (budget cuts), I ask him what we're supposed to do. "Well Mom, you require five things to complete the task." 
"First, you need a rubber band." 
"Wait, I need five things?" 
"Yes, first you need a rubber band. Second you need wax paper." 
"Third you need a block of wood." 
"Wood? What?" 
"Fourth you need a force scale." 
"No, that's not even a real thing." 
"Fifth, you need a meter stick." Well, shit.

"Darrin Antrobus [CC-BY-SA-2.0 (], via Wikimedia Commons"


  1. Bwahahahahaha!!! Gosh, I'm sorry. I really don't mean to laugh at your plight. *snickers* Okay, well I feel your pain. As you know, I have TWO middle schoolers. And while I can't completely empathize with you about Will, I will just say one thing. Be thankful you don't have a girl. :)

    Okay, that's not really very generous of me to speak that way about my progeny. But since you are a girl, and you were a 14 year old, you know about the hormones...and how those hormones can make sassy little girls behave. What fun!

    So, to look at this in a positive light (you know I'm all about putting a positive spin on things) let's just be thankful we have each other to turn to. We just might make it out of middle school alive!

    1. I know you feel my pain, but you have 3! I cannot feel yours. I'm oblivious, especially to the perils of raising girls. The stuff I did! Forget about it.

      And that is a great positive. You can tell me to gut up and I can...I'm not sure what my pep talk is. Shit, I haven't been stepping up to the plate. I don't have a catch phrase to buck up.

      I thought of a positive! We can turn all this into awesome fiction!

  2. Robyn, all I can say is that it doesn't last forever! And to stick to your guns *grins* And I have both girls and boys who have passed that stage, and girls and boys who are quickly entering that stage... I think moms have to have so much courage to just continue each day to be helpful, nice and loving!

    You'll make it, I'm sure. And do continue to remember how hard it was for you, as well. It's probably the same way for Will, with the added pressure of social media and information moving faster than our thoughts...

    Have a great weekend, Robyn, try to get some Talon in, that will help ;)

    1. It doesn't last forever is perfect. I can let those words bounce around my head when I feel like I'm losing it. And I can tell Will that too because I'm sure he's just as frustrated with this crappy stage.

      Oh, Talon! You just reminded me to put that on hold at the library. I haven't read anything by her. I know, terrible! I am in search for a good holiday contemp if you have any suggestions.

    2. And once they grow out of it and come out at the other side of all that hormonal shit, they are suddenly almost adults, who are reflective, fun to be around and whom you have to teach how to drive a car *grins*

  3. UGH! That's Zane and I next year. He's in sixth this year so I'm really not looking forward to those days. He's gotten so sassy and sarcastic. I know it's only going to get worse. Good luck getting through this phase!

    1. Oh the sass and sarcasm is already here, huh? It's tough when they go from these uber thoughtful sweet boys to these walking talking hormones! I know raising girls isn't any easier, but boys are plain gross. Really.